Tuesday, October 20, 2009

startled into life like fire

in grievous deity my cat
walks around
he walks around and around
with
electric tail and
push-button
eyes

he is
alive and
plush and
final as a plum tree

neither of us understands
cathedrals or
the man outside
watering his
lawn

if I were all the man
that he is
cat -
if there were men
like this
the world could
begin

he leaps up on the couch
and walks through
porticoes of my
admiration.

~ Charles Bukowski from Burning in Water, Drowning in Flame

This poem: The title – “startled” – awakened, ignited. Wonderful.
Anyone who owns a cat will relate to the description here, especially the “grievous deity.” I could not love “final as a plum tree” any more than I do. Of course, all things are final in and of themselves but this seems to express that in some essential way that I cannot begin to express. Then he shares with his cat the lack of understanding about not only cathedrals but the guy next door – essential mysteries and distances. But then…oh the killer stanza for me.. “if I were all the man/ that he is/ cat -/ if there were men/ like this/ the world could/ begin” This says something very real and when I first read it, very new to me. If we could be as genuine in ourselves as animals, well - imagine. I cannot unsee this now for, at its best, writing of any kind explains or illuminates for me something about this experience of being alive – this did that for me.
I also love that his admiration has porticoes – I had not thought to imagine the architecture of my esteem.